Nervous

Today is the day I’ve been really anxious about for the past few weeks. I am going  for some tests to finally find out what has been going on with my stomach.

As some of you may know, I have been getting these intense, sharp stomach pains that last for 4-5 days at a time for months now. As you also might not know, I am terrified of anything medical, and I was a hypochondriac for a long time. I have moved past that over the last few years, but it is still hard to shake sometimes and I’ve been scared and anxious over all of this, more than I need to be I’m sure.

The other part of it is really silly. When I was 20 I went with a friend to Sedona, who convinced me to visit a psychic with her. I wasn’t really into the idea but I went anyway, thinking it would be a fun, stupid thing we could laugh about. My friend’s reading was fun and stupid. Mine was that I was going to die young, because of something in my stomach. The reading ended with the psychic crying and giving me a hug, and telling me not to worry, some people just aren’t meant to be in this world very long. Nice! This was at the height of my hypochondria, and I was terrified for a very long time. Some of the other stuff he told me ended up not being true at all, but it’s still hard to push this stupid crap from my mind sometimes when I am in pain for days and nothing helps.

This is why I have a deep hatred for New-Age anything, psychics and parts of Sedona in general. Whether anything that jerk told me ends up being true, it preyed upon how scared and vulnerable I was back then and I wasted a lot of years thinking I was  sick and was going to die soon. Rational, I know.

So today I should know what’s going on, finally.

On a side note, things with my mother are improving a bit, but still very strained. May and June were bad months but hopefully July will be better, with a clean bill of health and a new outlook.

Wish me luck!

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7 responses

  1. This is why I don’t go to psychics. They freak me out too! Problem is my mother loves them and she is always asking them things about me on my behalf. And then she relays what they said and I have to live with the fact either what they said may come true and my mother will be proven right, or more likely explain to here she wasted her money and let her down.

    I am sure you are fine, just some thing we deal with as we age. Ah the joys of growing older! New aches and pains! I will be thinking of you! I do have to ask, do you drink a lot of diet soada or eat a lot of suger free foods? Because aspertame is a sneaky bitch and can do worlds of hurt to your insides.

  2. Thanks for the support, you guys! Everything went okay but I won’t find out anything until next week. Hopefully it will be good news. And Amanda, to answer your question, I actually don’t eat anything sugar-free or drink diet sodas. I know how bad they are for me, and lucky for me I can’t stand the taste of that fake-sugar stuff anyway. Too many chemicals! (I say as I gulp down my large Dr. Pepper and a cupcake! Ha!)
    Thanks again for thinking of me, ladies! You all are awesome. :)

  3. I still wish I had taken a drive up to Sedona right after that bullshit happened, just so I could confront that “psychic”… confront him with a sack of potatoes to the face.

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